To the genuinely loving, protective, nurturing dads out there -Happy Father’s Day! You are a blessing to your children and to the world.
For many people, Father’s Day is challenging. Maybe you recently lost your dad, maybe you are grieving because you and your partner have experienced the loss of a child or the inability to conceive. Maybe you have painful memories of your father. Whatever your situation-- you are not alone! Be gentle with yourself today, reach out to someone you trust and share your story if you can, allow yourself to feel whatever feelings you have without judgment.
Below is a fictionalized, but sadly realistic, account.
Miss Boykin gave our 4th grade class homework tonight, “Write a letter to your Father for Father’s Day”. There couldn’t be a worse assignment! Could be the quickest one ever though,
“Dear Dad, I hate you! ~Jillian”
Momma says I trip all over my words when I talk but give me a piece of paper and pen and they flow like water; even still, daddy don’t like nothing I give him. Even if I lied and put the nicest words in my letter and gave it to daddy all he’d do is glare at me with those cold, glazed-over black eyes and spew his meanness, “Jillian, this is the worst father’s day gift! I done told you and your brothers I wanted that new grill--or nothing. I asked for ONE THING and instead you give me some lousy letter with misspelled words, mistakes, and everything done wrong. You ain’t no good….worthless.” His belt slashed across my face would end the conversation but his mean words would linger and repeat forever.
I don’t know if I should bother writin’ a letter to you either God but last week in Sunday school Mrs. Gibbs said you want us to talk to you--that you know our needs and answer our prayers--so I thought I’d write you instead of my earth father. I’m thinkin’ you must be too busy for me ‘cause I been talking to you way before Mrs. Gibbs suggested it last week and you never answer me. Maybe you’re like me and you don’t remember stuff unless it’s written down. I read a book from the library last week, ‘Are you there God, it’s me, Margaret. She was mad at you too and wrote all about it; seems like you and her came to an understanding. Could you do that for me too?
Mama says she and daddy don’t play favorites with us kids but I don’t believe her ‘cause Tommy and Daniel never get beat, they never get sent to bed hungry, and daddy never sneaks into their bed at night. Anyhow, I think you play favorites too. My friend Olivia has nice parents, they don’t make her do disgusting things, they buy her clothes when she needs them, and take her to fun places too. Why did you give her parents like that but give me ones that hurt?
Some father you are! I thought you cared. Mrs. Gibbs said you know and see everything. If that’s true then you see what daddy’s doing to me and you know it’s against your rules. Why you not doing anything about it? What did I ever do to you? Why do you punish and hate me so much?
Yep…you fathers are all alike. Santa Claus is more of a father than you or my earth dad.
I don’t want a father no more.
Jillian, Age 9
Stay tuned to see the response Jillian receives. In the meantime, what would you say to Jillian? Click on the word ‘comments’ below to leave your remarks.